literature

Her First Word (TonyxReader) One-Shot

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“Come on, Mary,” you cooed. “Say ma-ma.”

Your daughter merely looked at you puzzled, her head cocked to the left slightly as she tried to figure out what you were saying. You had been trying all evening to get your daughter to say mama but that wasn’t working at all. She would only make gurgling sounds and then start laughing when she saw you frustrated.

After much frustration and trying your hardest to not let a curse word slip out of your mouth, you decided to do something fun.

“Hey!” you beamed. “How about I teach you some Japanese words?”

Mary clapped her hands excitedly and you scooped her up into your arms and placed her onto her booster seat so that you could also cook some dinner while teaching her. While rummaging around in the kitchen, you picked up an apple and walked over to her holding the apple near her face.

“Okay so this is an apple. In Japanese it’s called ringo,” you pronounced the word slowly. “Ri-n-go. Got it?”

Mary proceeded to say a bunch of nonsense in baby language, making you go back to the kitchen to see what else you could try to teach her what to say. She looked like she was enjoying herself though. After putting some pasta into the pot, you walked back to her and reached into the fridge to pull out a bar of chocolate.

Cho-ko-re-to,” you said. “Understand? Cho-ko-re-to. Now you try it.”

“Cho-cho-cho-cho,” Mary said repeatedly.

“Well now you kinda sound like a train,” you said feeling stumped.

You scratched your chin in thought and wondered if you should just go back to teaching her how to say mama. Mary on the other hand had no idea what was going on and was just happily sipping away on her sippy cup. She was a cutie. She looked just like her father with dark brown hair and chocolate colored eyes with tanned skin. Only when she was older would you see whose personality she got.

You stirred the noodles in the hot water and were now preparing the sauce that would go with it. Mary was starting to get hungry from all the wonderful food smells so she was fussing around in her chair.

“Be patient, sweetie,” you said. “Dinner will be done as soon as your father gets home.” A sly smile worked its way up to your lips. “I could give you some food now…if you say mizu. That’s water in Japanese.”

Again, Mary looked at you confused. You thought that she thought that you were probably insane. The way she looked at you made you think so. She proceeded to smack her lips together as she hit her sippy cup on the booster table repeatedly. She was swinging her tiny little legs, getting anxious and wanting her father to be home already. You wanted him home too. Maybe he could help you out with this.

♦♦♦♦♦♦

“Mizu, Mary, mi-i-zu,” you persisted with your daughter.

Again Mary just pouted at you.

“Okay how about saying biichi?” you tried. “It’s bee-chi. It means beach. Now try that!”

Mary tried to make the b sound and that’s all she was doing right now. You had high hopes that she was going to get it soon but then you heard Tony strolling through the door. He was singing a classic rock song and smiled when he saw you. He threw his jacket aside as well as his keys and wrapped his arms around you tight, before placing a kiss on your lips.

“How are my two favorite girls today?” he grinned.

“Good,” you smiled. “I’ve been trying to teach Mary how to say mama all day but gave up and tried to teach her some Japanese words.”

He stared at you blankly for a moment.

“....”

“What?”

“So you thought that if our daughter couldn’t say something in English, then she could for sure say something in Japanese?” he asked you deadpanned.

“Hey!” you snapped. “I was bored and she hasn’t learned how to talk yet! Don’t blame me for trying to be creative. Besides? What if my love for anime just magically ended up in her brain?”

He ruffled your hair and laughed. “Alright darling, I’ll show you how to do this.”

You raised an eyebrow at him as he kneeled down in front of Mary and tried to get her to say dada. She immediately smiled and laughed when she saw her father, wanting to jump into his arms. However being the baby that she was, she couldn’t do that yet. Tony took her out of the booster seat so that he could carry her and did a small spin to make her laugh. You smiled watching the two laugh with one another, a warm feeling spreading in your heart.

“Say da-da, Mary, say dada,” Tony insisted with a smile on his face.

“If I can’t get her to say mama, then I bet you she can’t say dada,” you laughed.

He turned to you and smirked. “We’ll see about that.”

Mary had started to make the b sounds again and then made a buh sound that slowly turned into a be-eh. You watched her curiously and to your surprise—

“Biichi!” she exclaimed excitedly.

“Yay!” you squealed with delight. “Mary just said her first word!”

“....Seriously?” Tony frowned. “And hold up a minute, did my daughter just say the b-word?”

“What?” you said confused. “She didn’t say bitch. Oh shit! I mean...uh...uh…Mary you can only say those words behind our backs when you’re thirteen and then in front of us when you’re eighteen or early twenties,” you said nervously, receiving a glare from Tony.

“We need to get your cursing problem fixed,” he then laughed.

“I don’t have a problem,” you grumbled.

“Biichii!” Mary said again.

“Okay seriously,” Tony sighed. “What is she saying?”

“She’s saying beach in Japanese.”

“....”

“What?”

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”  













♣♣♣Extended Ending♣♣♣

“Biichi! Biichi! Biichi!”

Mary had been saying those words non-stop for the past ten minutes. It was really starting to drive you and Tony insane. It got to the point where you two were now bickering.

“Out of all the words you had to teach her, you chose a word that sounded like bitch in English?” he gaped.

You flailed your arms in the air dramatically. “I didn’t think she would learn it so quick!”

“Woman do you understand that if this word sticks to her, we’ll have a lot of explaining to do to the preschool teacher?”

“It won’t—”

“Biichi!” Mary interrupted with a giggle, finding the sight of her parents fighting hilarious.

It was as if she knew that by saying that word, it would only get both of you more frustrated. Oh yeah, she was so going to be a rebel when she got older.

“Listen we’ll be fine!” you insisted. “By the time she gets to preschool she’ll know how to properly speak English.”

“And if the word just slips out?”

You glared at him. “In what moment would the word just slip out?”

“Well—wait, is something burning?” he asked you confused.

Your eyes went wide and you ran to the stove.

“My pasta!” you cried, falling to the floor on your knees when you saw the smoke rising from the pot.

“Hey guys,” Natasha’s voice came when she entered the room. “I’m here to pick up Mary so that I can babysit her. You can—”

She froze mid sentence when she:

A) Saw Tony trying desperately to make Mary say dada.

B) Saw smoke filling the kitchen.

C) Saw you crying over your pasta when in fact you should be making the smoke go away.

And D) Heard Mary saying a word that oddly resembled the b-word.

With a sigh, she picked up Mary from her booster chair and started heading towards the door.

“Just call me when you have this all sorted out,” she said, not wanting to deal with this right now.

What my life will most likely be like when I have children....except with friends who never seem to go home XD

I got this idea on the bus today at school when going through all the Japanese I learned so far in the past year. Biichi sounds like bitch to me in my opinion so I figured, why not make a one-shot out of it? :D 

Plus, this was a prize for all of you who have stuck with me despite the fact that I've been posting nothing but angst these few days XD 
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keybladewielder93's avatar
OMG THIS IS HILARIOUSPikachu Piff Plz England (Laughing) [V3] Llama Emoji-01 (Laughing) [V1] Laugh LOL